Fees dude, fees...

Due to subscribing to a daily quotes blog, and then saving all the quotes that I would like to share but doing nothing about it, I have a backlog to blog, dog.
Please enjoy these witty aphorisms, and ponder this:
Why does the spellcheck in Bloglines not recognize the word "blog?"

"It is not bigotry to be certain we are right; but it is bigotry to be unable to imagine how we might possibly have gone wrong."-G. K. Chesterton

"People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure."-Russell Baker

"If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity."-Bill Vaughan

"The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'"-Ronald Reagan

"The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you."-Rita Mae Brown

"The whole dream of democracy is to raise the proletarian to the level of stupidity attained by the bourgeois."-Gustave Flaubert

"The quickest way to a man's heart really is through his stomach, because then you don't have to chop through that pesky rib cage."-J. Jacques

"I like to play blackjack. I'm not addicted to gambling, I'm addicted to sitting in a semi-circle."-Mitch Hedberg

"I have given two cousins to war and I stand ready to sacrifice my wife's brother."-Artemus Ward

"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning."-Rich Cook

And my favorite of them all:
"A witty saying proves nothing."-Voltaire